The Way I Am Now by Amber Smith

Author:Amber Smith
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Margaret K. McElderry Books
Published: 2023-11-07T00:00:00+00:00

PART THREE

September

JOSH

I left her asleep in my bed this morning. She didn’t even stir when my alarm went off at five. I was so tempted to stay with her. But I’m not quite off the coach’s shit list yet, so I can’t afford to be late to a single practice or workout if I have any hope of playing this season.

The first month of the semester has flown by. Between my practice schedule and Eden working, plus our course loads, it seems like we have less and less time for each other every day.

I make it through morning training from six to eight, then the team meeting before my first class at nine. I text her good morning on the way. But she’s usually running too late; she won’t text back until after her first class ends at ten thirty. I only have an hour break between morning classes, and then it’s back to prep for practice again.

I hate that there’s no time to just relax together. I don’t know how we’d see each other at all if we weren’t in the same building. She got a second job at the café across the street from our apartment, but the manager’s already being a dick about her availability. I don’t know what he expects. This is a college town; everyone’s schedules are crazy. I’ve gone in there to study when she works on the weekends. I tell her it’s so I can spend a little more time around her. That’s mostly true, but I also don’t trust the guy. It seems like he has it out for her for no reason, criticizing everything she does, wanting her to come in early, stay late.

I was there once when she dropped a mug on the floor and it broke.

She laughed for about two seconds out of embarrassment—it was charming and cute and everyone thought so, giving her these sympathetic nods and smiles. And then, as she was literally kneeling on the floor to clean it up, the manager came over all red-faced and tossed a rag down next to her, muttering, “It’s not funny. Pay attention to what you’re doing. If you can’t be more careful, you can’t work here.”

The way he said it, though, he was so angry, way angrier than he should’ve been over a cheap ceramic mug. And the way she looked up at him. I saw something flash in her eyes. She was scared, for just a second, I could tell. I stood up and walked over, not even knowing what I was going to do or say, but I had the most intense urge to grab the guy by his stupid apron and push him up against the wall, drag him outside. Not a familiar feeling for me; I didn’t like how quickly it came on.

“Look, I distracted her,” I told him. “I’ll pay for the mug.”

He didn’t even speak to me; he just glared at us both and walked away.

I squatted next to her and said quietly, “You absolutely do not need to put up with that shit.

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